[He shoots a glance across the water, and shrugs.]
That time, inside the mirror... It told me, if I didn't want to be left behind, I had to change. It didn't tell me anything about how, or when... What if everything I'm trying is just taking me further and further away from where I want to be? What happens if I don't try? On my own, I don't know.
Then I thought, if I can beat you... Well, not just you. But if I could show you I know exactly what makes you tick, make you depend on that, then - I already know you're doing good, see? So that must mean I'm doing better than good... in some way.
[With his own self-deprecating smile, he shakes his head.] In the end, I'm not like that. I think there's only one person who could be, and it turns out he's not like that either. That's... Anyway, that's what went through my head. Just a bunch of crap, huh?
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ninetydegrees
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on 2014-07-25 01:14 pm (UTC)[He shoots a glance across the water, and shrugs.]
That time, inside the mirror... It told me, if I didn't want to be left behind, I had to change. It didn't tell me anything about how, or when... What if everything I'm trying is just taking me further and further away from where I want to be? What happens if I don't try? On my own, I don't know.
Then I thought, if I can beat you... Well, not just you. But if I could show you I know exactly what makes you tick, make you depend on that, then - I already know you're doing good, see? So that must mean I'm doing better than good... in some way.
[With his own self-deprecating smile, he shakes his head.] In the end, I'm not like that. I think there's only one person who could be, and it turns out he's not like that either. That's... Anyway, that's what went through my head. Just a bunch of crap, huh?